Disabled & Dating (Or Not)

This is one of those topics that I know can be iffy for some, and it’s one I’ve held off on writing about even though I’ve been asked about it more than a few times, both by parents and other disabled individuals. I’m not getting into sexuality or anything overly personal like that, just my experiences and some friendly advice. And I’m not really sure how to ease into it, so I’m just going for it.

I, like a lot of young men, like women. I’ve had, and have, friends who are girls, but I’ve never had a girlfriend.

Had a few crushes in junior high and high school that my parents helped me with, advice-wise. Nothing more than that, really. Maybe the odd slow dance at a school dance but, honestly, I was usually too nervous to even speak to most of the girls I liked.

Further into adulthood, as I got more comfortable with being social, I would occasionally meet (girl) friends for coffee, lunch, or one time, thanks to a poorly attended event, dinner. Some people might call those dates if they wanted to, but they were just innocent socializing (to me, anyway).

I’ve thought about dating, going so far as to join a singles group for nerds in my area. Nice idea, but the only thing that came of it was a group screening of the last Star Trek movie.

Honestly, with the disability and everything associated with it, I’m a little hesitant to date. First, what woman in her 30’s is going to want to come back to her boyfriend’s parent’s basement? Then there’s the potential scenario of me being out with a woman and having a Para Transpo driver walk in and yelling “Pick up for MacLellan!” just as things get comfortable. Sounds real romantic, doesn’t it?

This might sound self-deprecating and even a little rude but, at the moment, I’ve got too many of my own issues to deal with. I don’t want to add any more or put someone else through any of it. I may think about dating again in the future but, for now, I’m in no rush. I’m happy just being single and gaining at least some form of independence.

Cheers!