Transitioning Tuesday: Feeling Comfortable

Transitioning to Adulthood with a Disability: Being Comfortable with Your Disability

 

Normally when I write about transitioning, it’s an article or post about some concrete milestone, like going to college or looking for work. This time, I wanted to do something different.

 After many years of listening to people’s comments, questions, and opinions, as well as looking at my own experiences, I’ve found that one of the most important aspects of transitioning to adulthood with a disability is the ability to be comfortable with your disability, and disabilities in general.

 I’ll admit that this is something I’ve only come to grips with relatively recently. I’ve always had this fear of people thinking I’m developmentally delayed, especially when I need help with something. It has nothing to do with anyone with a developmental disability, more so the perception from other people and groups.

 This fear of mine really started to show in college. During one stint, I took on way more than I could handle. Long story short, I let my own hang-ups get the better of me, tried to do too much on my own, and screwed up big time. Eventually, I got it through my head that it would be smarter to ask for help and fixed my mistakes when I went back for another program.

 Unfortunately, the fear resurfaced when I needed to make use of accessible transportation to get to and from college, and later, work. The main pick-up/drop-off area for Para Transpo (that’s the name of Ottawa’s accessible bus service) at the college I attended was outside a life skills program, and I tended to get humiliated at times when drivers would mistake me for a student in the program. The same situation occurred when I started with the treatment centre I volunteer at. The centre is next to a day program, and I would always feel bad when a driver would stop there instead of the centre. I quickly realised how foolish, and even rude, this was of me and I’ve stopped thinking like that.

 A) The drivers were only going to an assigned location, and B) So what? So what if some people think I have a developmental disability? It doesn’t take away from any of my past or present accomplishments.

For the record, I do have a slight developmental disability. When I was diagnosed with Joubert syndrome, I learnt that it’s a fairly common trait. (I'll get to this in a later post)

 

I’m still learning how to keep my old fears away. The advocacy is a big help. It’s always encouraging to talk to people who are going through roughly the same situation, or might go through it later on.

 So, if you’re ever feeling uncomfortable about some aspect of your disability or how someone might perceive it, don’t be afraid to talk (or in this case, write) about it. People will understand you a little better and you’ll be able to get help a lot quicker.

 

Cheers