Transitioning to Adulthood with a Disability: Being Comfortable with Your
Disability
Normally when I write about
transitioning, it’s an article or post about some concrete milestone, like
going to college or looking for work. This time, I wanted to do something
different.
After many years of listening to
people’s comments, questions, and opinions, as well as looking at my own
experiences, I’ve found that one of the most important aspects of transitioning
to adulthood with a disability is the ability to be comfortable with your
disability, and disabilities in general.
I’ll admit that this is something
I’ve only come to grips with relatively recently. I’ve always had this fear of
people thinking I’m developmentally delayed, especially when I need help with
something. It has nothing to do with anyone
with a developmental disability, more so the perception from other people and
groups.
This fear of mine really started to show
in college. During one stint, I took on way more than I could handle. Long
story short, I let my own hang-ups get the better of me, tried to do too much
on my own, and screwed up big time. Eventually, I got it through my head that
it would be smarter to ask for help and fixed my mistakes when I went back for
another program.
Unfortunately, the fear resurfaced
when I needed to make use of accessible transportation to
get to and from college, and later, work. The main pick-up/drop-off area for
Para Transpo (that’s the name of Ottawa’s accessible bus service) at the
college I attended was outside a life skills program, and I tended to get
humiliated at times when drivers would mistake me for a student in the program.
The same situation occurred when I started with the treatment centre I
volunteer at. The centre is next to a day program, and I would always feel bad
when a driver would stop there instead of the centre. I quickly realised how
foolish, and even rude, this was of me and I’ve stopped thinking like that.
A) The drivers were only going to an
assigned location, and B) So what? So what if some people think I have a
developmental disability? It doesn’t take away from any of my past or present
accomplishments.
For the record, I do have a slight
developmental disability. When I was diagnosed with Joubert syndrome, I learnt
that it’s a fairly common trait. (I'll get to this in a later post)
I’m still learning how to keep my old
fears away. The advocacy is a big help. It’s always encouraging to talk to
people who are going through roughly the same situation, or might go through it
later on.
So, if you’re ever feeling
uncomfortable about some aspect of your disability or how someone might perceive it, don’t be afraid to
talk (or in this case, write) about it. People will understand you a little
better and you’ll be able to get help a lot quicker.
Cheers
